5.15.21 Update. Not so much of an update. Oh, Well...
5.15.2021 The Real
This just in. Well nothing really. The only real thing is livin’. Been completely living in a Beach Bungalow making Sea Creatures for your delights as well as a few zines for therapeutic reasons and a breakdown. Music. I can’t wait to share all this hard work off.
until then.
Cheers from me to you.
Sincerely Your Friend Me aka Jeffery Page
I woke up this morning. Nothing new. Same urge to just end it all. I shouldn’t talk like this but I guess being honest fucks it all up. Being honest get’s you alienated as they want to ship you away or dispose of you. I mean seriously. That’s what they want to do. They always have. Get rid of the cancer. The misfits. I guess just me. Either way it’s no big deal. It’s 6:30 am. I can’t sleep anymore. Now, fixated on the guy next door as he snores. These walls are partially the cause as not only can I attest to the fact they are paper thin Trust me though when I say this is not the reason I can not sleep. Who cares? I have first world problems. I’m privileged. I’m crazy. I sit up in this old full size bed that is just 2 inches shy of my slender frame inherited from what I consider is inheritances of past lives now attached to another living human. To save the description let’s just say I’m not too far off of Winston Smith of a George Orwell’s character. Not like any of that really matters as really I just try to live life by occupying my mind observing other human nature. Is it right? Probably not. Fuck It. Either way I do believe in early bird catches the worm. At any rate my feet are now the ground. So I guess this is the time I let you know this is just a day. I have know idea what will happen except technically it’s how my life is. Chaotic. Random and it’s only just begun.
Stretching for a bit just out of bed I step forward and drop to do 30 pushups. It’s not like I’m super fit. I just do it for therapy. It’s like being in the army or prison. It’s how my life may be. Except for I have an ex who still visits and plays mind games on me you know. The last five pushups are always a little shaky but I still have mid day and night time ones as well. Turning on my shower first I then reach over to turn on the light given just a little more time to warm up before getting in. Taking a piss and undressing I flush the toilet I slip into the steam to get in the shower. I could lie to you and say that the morning doesn’t start off with some me time but let’s face it we all love a little of our own me time. I just choose to have my semen already be buried at sea for easy clean up. The shower definitely is warm and the water slowly is at least making me feel alive. Maybe it’s the fantasy. I could get into details or scenarios as the mind is an amazing thing. For reasons of self censorship I guess we will just say it’s Rainbows and Unicorns. Getting dressed is pretty easy. Blue Slacks, White T Shirt, a Button up cardigan and dock shoes. It’s funny how conditioned everything in life is. Seriously I can’t think when I haven’t technically followed the rules yet still have just walked a thin line between fantasy and real life. That’s all the world seems to be. Fantasy or Real Life. Walking into the living room I cut to the kitchen to put on water for coffee and an egg. I prepare the french press put some bread in the toaster. Grabbing a tomato afterwards slicing it onto a plate. Just as the toaster pops I place them on the plate grabbing butter from the fridge and spreading in a little more than the average serving of butter should be onto each one. About this time I pour the water making coffee and get my egg cut on my plate. Walking to the living room I place everything on the coffee table. Reach over turning on the television opening the curtains to my surprise There is a great dane squatting taking a big dump. Still steaming It might make this coffee harder to swallow but isn’t just life to serve up the ying and the yang. Welcome to my life.