They Hit Deep

What I say or write usually has some reflection on my own personal experiences as well observations of people I know , the world and direct information I have gathered from books of history, psychology and fiction. Most likely there is no direct reference to any particular person. However, In the today’s society it’s very obvious on how psychological damaging the internet may be in this “ME” type of era. Regardless if it is a person who is narcissistic or completely depressed it seems my posts or trinkets of writing seem to hit everyone with some range of emotion. The narcissist seems to think I’m talking about them as obviously it’s all about them. While the depressed person seems to know I truly relate to their depression. In Los Angeles I’ve met quite a few of these people on both sides of this pendulum. Ranging from lovers, to friends, family to just strangers along the way. I don’t believe there is much of a difference between being confident and secure. Yet a true narcissistic trait that is really apparent in a lot of people that move here or really truly want to be famous on in any level is a facade they create for attention. Which is funny as to me since I am an artist I truly have always believed that I’d have a path like Vincent Van Gough or the most recent found genius David Hackney of the band called DEATH. It would not be until I die that people would give a shit about what I do. I mean let’s face it. I don’t follow trends nor do I give respect to those who don’t show respect to others. That respect does not have to be even given towards me. I truly understand I rub people the wrong way as I am direct and honest. However, how people treat people who serve them, love them or even work for them can be a true insight on this persons’s true character. As for me I am grateful for all the people that I have crossed paths with as I truly feel most people are genuine in general. I honestly try to treat all humans the same. It’s usually a negative action of theirs which cause the negative actions within me. As I definitely don’t have a problem saying what I mean regardless of the repercussions. In today’s society I believe that all my words are meant for to be heard. Not saying it’s all seriousness as I love to laugh as well. Although this freedom of speech is why I have never judged an artist without understanding the trials and tribulation it takes to be one and have given “RESPECT” to those who practice what they preach Despite if I personally like their art or craft. Technically that goes towards anyone who tries to be the best at what they pursue or that are being honest. Although fame and fortune should never be a drive for any success solely as in the end you are truly just doing it to say look at me rather than the art or product you are saying you so deeply care about. Which is probably why most of these people end up treating people badly as they know in some ways they are a fraud. Even if they would never admit it. Which leads to why I feel the depression and frustrations I see in the rest of the world are so apparent today as anyone who truly cares about people struggle with why they may be overlooked or considered unsuccessful. It’s easy to understand why people feel this way. Especially now while being overlooked and being bombarded in a world of technology that has truly most people in a high school world again. If you don’t look like this, drive that or have a million of followers you must be a loser. I mean seriously the drive for success is no longer a reason to be good at what you do. It’s all about how cool you are. Which in high school we can see that concept of why majority of the world can reflect pre covid times to how that was somewhat of a joke. Prom Kings and Prom Queens were not always the best people. Technically they usually made poor and smart people feel as if they were less than them which I believe is called bullying. Not saying that it is in all cases as all theories can be proven wrong. Yet in most cases these people we elect into roles of authority or influence have most of their personal agendas based on fame and fortune which in some ways are considered sins at least in a Bible language. Even in psychological terms they are considered very bad traits for society. Yet here we are with technology leading the way with AI and algorithms and added with isolation and world tragedy we’ve caused a huge effect of depression and narcissism. If you don’t want to be fame rich and famous you are a loser. Which obviously is not true. Then we have the other bombardment led by these same type of people who are stressing agendas of HELPing others which is still being driven with same agenda behind the narcissistic traits as these people are ahead of these so called movements are just wanting the gratification of having praise. If you don’t help everyone around you and show compassion you must be selfish. Even if it’s only because as you are struggling with your own personal issues wether financially or mental. I mean have you ever been in a situation where someone is asking for a donation to a charity and makes you feel guilty for not contributing when they know nothing about your own personal situation. I know I have. I was told once by someone who was supposed to be close to me that I was a cold person because I didn’t back them on all their causes of saving the world. Yet, looking at them now I find it completely funny as I didn’t understand why they were not trying to help themselves mentally and psychically first. Especially since they truly had many problems in both health cases of mentally and psychically. I literally saw this person breaking down both mentally and psychically in front of me. Yet, their personal well being was ignored. As in reality they only wanted to only help things that would give them attention or money regardless of what they were doing personally to themselves and others around them. Ignoring the things that were really in their change. Making most of those who did care about them distant. I believe that was to protect themselves from anyone that knew them as it was against their road to their agenda. As they didn’t want real change which technically starts with them which is real work. I mean seriously. If you are not taking care of yourself you can not help others in reality. Not too mention most of this stuff was all based off their own ego. They were older than me and also because I questioned who they truly were they obviously didn’t want to listen as I was telling them to look in the mirror and lead by example. I even once said,” You are worrying about something 400 miles from you yet your own community that you say, “you love” has blocks of homeless people right down the street suffering. It made no sense to me. Although in hindsight it does now. It was a facade for the people who followed as they truly have mental and health issues they needed to take care of. Yet in reality they just pretended that to care about things that were popular to care about at the time. It’s obvious now that it was only to distract them from the true problems they didn’t want to face.” Obviously that didn’t go over to well and I was made an enemy since unfortunately the truth hurts. That was a lie they want to keep up with.Which is why these people who have these drives based on monetary or personal gain is always a bad combo in general. Hence why the internet can be bad when it’s all a curated persona driven by personal addictions and dopamines. It allows these type of people to create a facade under the cloak of a smile and a do good persona. I mean seriously the way I see these people are “Brighter the Picture Darker the Negative.” It’s the way I see most world leaders and Politicians are. The bad ones are very apparent yet the overly nicer ones scary me more. I mean at least I know Putin is Putin. Our President’s come shaking hands and kissing babies. It’s like Jeffery Dahmer’s Persona was always told by others , “He was such a nice boy.” Obviously that is why it’s good to try to really get to see these people in both sides of who they are not just the one side they show like a magician’s trick. So it seems as these type of people are also ruling the internet and most major companies. It can be seen pretty easy why they control the mass majority in an algorithm world. Which unfortunately creates this tunnel of depression for others who are actually honest with themselves or that truly suffer from depression and empathy. As these real people work one day at a time and struggle with real life problems. Not surrounding themselves with a facade of problems they can not help or ask for. The average person in today’s age worries about their own health and finances. Then about their friends and family. Then about the community. Then after that they may truly be able to change the world. Then again this is just my view and I’m always subject to being wrong however I don’t care. As I’m not trying to help anyone other than those I love and myself. Which is also something I had to work on as I’ve been abandoned by a narcissist as a child and also got caught up with more into my adulthood. I have dealt with my own depression and even dealt with the hardest thing in the world to truly do which is looking at myself in the mirror and being honest with that person. I have made mistakes yet it’s never been about being who I am. Which made me realize it starts with loving yourself and those around you. Everything else won’t matter in the end other than your true compassion and honesty. That is why my words from a friend over 20 years said, “Your words hit deep.” I guess it’s because my two best qualities are also my two worst qualities. I’m compassionate and understanding. Which is like a double edge sword. Especially if you mistake my kindness for a weakness. Trust me when I say", “I will only take so much before you bring out the worst in me if you start really taking advantage of my friendship”. Don’t give more to those who don’t reciprocate. As all friendships should be pretty balanced. Sincerely ME aka your friend Jeffery Page

They Hit deep is about a view on society, reflection and a response to a friend who said, “Your words hit deep”. Overall it’s just a thought and an opinion from someone using their freedom to speak their own mind. I mean in the end should we all not just say, “FUCK IT”. Sincerely Me aka your friend Jeffery Page